A long time ago, my brother Henry told me, “Hey you should try speed dating sometime!”
I didn’t really give it much thought until recently.
Saw a link somewhere online for a dating event in the DFW area for about $30-40, so I thought to myself, “Why not? I ain’t got anything else going on this weekend.”
Signed up for it.
A day before the event, I looked myself in the mirror and said, “Damn it, I look so untidy. Need a shave. Both on my face and on my head.”
Then I came to the realization that my appearance shouldn’t be such a big deal. They should love me for my insides not my outsides.
Started running through my closet for something to wear and it gave me a headache because I never spent more than 5 mins in there. Here I’ve been dragging myself through my whole wardrobe to pick the perfect outfit.
I settled for slacks, collared t-shirt, a hoodie, and some rock-climbing shoes (they’re really comfortable).
Arrived at the event, which happened to be a casual restaurant, and noticed that 75% of the people there were dressed better than me.
Okay, not the best start, but just go with it. No way I’m driving home 60 mins to get re-dressed again.
This is my first speed dating event so naturally I was a nervous wreck. I found a far distant corner and quickly made that little area my nest.
Looking around, I observed a couple of things:
- There were some people who came with friends, which I’m sure helped them alleviate any anxiety that would occur.
- The female half of the group were a good mix. A little bit of everything.
- I remember my brother told me that when he went, it was somewhat competitive with the guys. Before & after the event, guys naturally gravitate towards the cute girls, making it really competitive for them to out-shine each other. Everyone wanted to make a lasting impression on the highly-coveted females.
- I was going in expecting the same, but for some reason most of the guys were pretty cool.
- Never once did I feel like any of the guys were trying to out-do me and most of them were genuinely nice to each other.
The way this speed-dating worked is everyone got a card with all of the opposite sex’s name on it. You’d rotate around, talk to everyone for like 5 minutes.
Immediately after talking to a girl, you’d circle on your card whether you’d like to see them again. After the event you log into their website and enter your answers. If both the guy and girl say yes, then the website automatically sends you the opposite person’s email so you guys can continue talking with each other.
I remember reading on the website about a public comment asking the website, “When do the results come in? I’ve been waiting a couple of weeks already and I’ve gotten no matches. Is there something wrong with the system?”
After I filled in my answers, I got the responses within a couple of days, so I had a feeling this guy had high expectations on the impression he made on the girls on the speed dating event.
He obviously felt like he should’ve gotten more matches, but couldn’t admit to himself that perhaps no one was interested in him at all. So he blamed the problem on the website not delivering the results he wanted.
I talked to one of the guys at the event and he told me, there’s been multiple times in which he would go to these events and get no matches. It’s not easy to find a match. Sometimes you both dis-like each other. Sometimes only one person likes the other.
And here I thought, I was guaranteed at least one date from this speed dating event.
When we started, we found out that the guys out-numbered the gals, 12 to 15, so most of the time 3 guys were just chilling waiting around because there was no girls to talk to.
During the down time, I just took the opportunity to network and find out what the other dudes did. I got some business cards and met some cool guys.
When I was actually with the girls, I tried my best to keep the conversation going while trying my best to get to know them as much as I could in 5 minutes.
Like any type of conversation, some lasted forever while others seemed like it was barely got going.
Some of the hi-lights of the night were:
- One girl had drank way too much alcohol, so when we were talking, she was half there half gone. Multiple times, she pulled out her phone to check text messages. Somewhat rude, but drunk people aren’t always the most considerate type of people.
- On my last girl, I realized quickly that I wasn’t interested, so pretty much I was looking forward to going home. It was late at night, I had a long drive, and was pretty much exhausted from talking to so many people in one night. Well, during the conversation, I looked around and noticed the coordinator wasn’t there anymore. She usually rings the bell after five minutes. I figured to myself, it must be five minutes already, and the coordinator probably left because she just wants us to enjoy our last person … you know talk for as long as we’d like. The only problem was, I wasn’t particularly interested in extending the conversation with this particular person. So I did the only reasonable thing I could think of. I extended my hand to shake her hand and told her, “Well, it’s getting late. It was nice talking to you. Have a good night.” On my way out, I saw the coordinator in the far corner, apparently she hasn’t left yet. I also noticed that everyone else was still talking to their date. Oops, the 5 minutes haven’t ended yet and I just walked out on my date. I am a complete fool. I had two choices then, either go back and tell my date that I didn’t realized that my 5 minutes had ended, apologize, and try to pickup the conversation where we left off or I could just continue walking off. I decided that the most humane thing to do for both of us is to just leave. Yes, I know I was rude for leaving her like that, but honestly I really thought that the time was up.
After I got home, my mom asked me, “So how did the speed dating go? Did you meet any lovely Vietnamese girls?”
I told my mom, “There were no Asians at the event, only American, Mexicans, and African-Americans.”
She then asked, “So who did you end up with?”
I smirked at her and said, “If there’s no Asians there, who would YOU want me to end up with?”
My mom laughed to herself.
My mom prefers Vietnamese girls, so anyone not Vietnamese is equally un-desirable based on my mom’s preferences.