Tag Archives: apple

FB Status Update: The Apple Doesn’t Fall Far From The Tree

My brother Nghia Nguyen had this uneasy look on his face and asked me, “Hey you ever get this tightness sensation in your chest?”

Me: “Hmmm, sometimes I get it … but I’m not sure what caused it.”
Nghia: “Yeah, it’s really uncomfortable.”
Me: “Maybe you pulled a muscle or something.”
Nghia: “No it’s definitely not that. I asked Dr Chuong about this sensation and he told me it’s a female thing.”
Me: “What do you mean it’s a female thing.”
Nghia: “Well, Dr Chuong say’s that girls have hormones that concentrate around their chest area.”
Me: “Yeah, that’s where their boobies are.”
Nghia: “Exactly.”
Me: “You do realize that we don’t have boobies right?”
Nghia: “Dr. Chuong say’s the painful sensation in your chest is related to the fact that we lack boobies.”
Me: “Are you trying to say that this pain I get in my chest is my female hormones yearning to develop into nice firm breasts?”
Nghia: “That sounds nasty, but it’s pretty close to what Dr. Chuong said.”
Me: “And you just admitted that you had this pain in your chest, so that means you’re going to have big boobies!!!”
Nghia: “Nooo. Not me. What? So did you!”
Me: ” … I don’t remember admitting to having any chest pains …”
Nghia: “Liar!”

So my brother just admitted to me that he has chest pains and that the cause of the pain is his female hormones going haywire on him.

Not the most masculine thing that has came out of Nghia’s mouth.

Now I don’t know if I should believe anything Dr. Chuong tells me anymore.

How can he tell my brother something like this?

Even if it’s true, I wouldn’t want to hear that about myself.

Couldn’t Dr. Chuong have said something like, “Oh yeah that pain, it’s your inner Hulk trying to break free.”

Discovering female hormones inside of him could traumatize Nghia for the rest of his life.

He could end up being like me when he’s over 30.

And nobody wants that, because the world ain’t big enough for two Thao’s.

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Gaming Apps Review: Candy Crush Saga

Description:

Puzzle game by King.com that is extremely addictive.  The goal is to match up 3 or 4 same colored candy to achieve a goal.  Goals include reaching a certain score, reaching a certain score by a certain time limit, reach a certain score by a certain # of moves, destroying objective pieces, and completing special candy orders.  You can play this game on your android or apple device.  It also can be played through facebook.

Cost:

Free to play, but you only get 5 lives.  You can pay money to get more total lives.  You get a free life every 20-30 minutes.  You can also get free lives by asking your facebook friends for lives.  There are special items that you can pay such as unlimited time, extra moves, and starting with special candies.

Difficulty:

Varies by stage and can range from easy to extremely difficult.  They always throw in at least one difficult stage for every ten games you play.  Each new kingdom presents one new puzzle problem that they present in the game which they will combine with previous puzzle problems.  This keeps the game fresh and extremely tough to beat considering the fact that you must take into account all the problems.

Mind-Games:

You can get more lives by watching advertisement.  Pretty much 1 life per commercial you watch.  It’s one way they make money off of you.  By forcing you to ask friends for lives, it makes Candy Crush a social game where the more you interact with friends the longer you can play.  Even if you don’t ask friends for lives, you have to ask them for tickets which is required to go to the next kingdom.  Time limit on lives, forces you into a habit of coming 2-3 hours later to play over and over again.  After doing this for a couple of days, it becomes second nature to log onto Candy Crush.

Ratings:

5/5, for being extremely addictive and rewarding if you surpass levels in which you were stuck on for 4 days.

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