Tag Archives: dating

Extroverted Introverts

One of my facebook friends recently posted this online article called “18 Struggles of Having An Outgoing Personality But Actually Being Shy & Introverted“.

After reading the article, I felt certain points rang true for me.

“#17. You prefer to travel alone, but meet up with people once you’re there.”

  • Every single month, I try to visit my sister in Houston.  At the end of this year, I plan on driving to California (a total of 21 hours of driving) all by myself.  As an introvert, I don’t view long road trips as a daunting or dreadful task.  I look forward to them and try to make the drive as enjoyable as can be, by burning some new songs, downloading some new audiobooks, or making some few scenic stops along the way.

“#16. You’re at your happiest in places like coffee shops and cafés: surrounded by people, but still closed off and keeping to yourself.”

  • I always bring my headphones while I’m at Starbucks.  That way, I can be around a full coffee shop and still feel excluded.  I frequent Starbucks at least once a week and always feel productive when I’m there.  I guess a small part of me enjoys seeing people coming and going.  And a big part of me revels in the seclusion that is promised to me while I drown myself in my music.

  “#7. Dating is weird, because you’re smiling and laughing and talkative at dinner, and then you don’t want to answer their texts for four days, because like, you just want to be left alone…”

  • My alone time can sometimes be mis-interpreted as a lack of interest in the opposite sex.  I remember my last girlfriend wanted to break up with me because she didn’t even feel like we were dating.  I guess I enjoyed my alone time too much.  There are times where I get too comfortable in my personal space, that I forget about the other person.

“#4. When you do choose to grace a party with your presence, you are the life of it. You’re dancing on the table and doing body shots until 3 a.m.”

“# 5. … You then retreat into three days of complete solitude to recover.”

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Top 10 Reasons of Why I’m Still Single

1.  I’m gay.

  • My cousin TA told me this.  She said, “A lot of people have been asking me if you’re gay.”  I didn’t ask her who, but I assume it would have to be her friends.  It could also be people in our family too.  I’ve been single for about 10 years, so I can see why they are wondering.  No girlfriend for such a long time, maybe he doesn’t like girls?  It doesn’t help that I enjoy going to gay clubs.  Plus, in my parent’s living room, there’s a picture of me wearing a dress when I was young.  I have to admit, I looked very flattering in that dress.

2.  I hangout with TA too much.

  • This is my mom’s words.  I went on a road trip to New Orleans with my cousin TA in August and when my mom found out, this is what she had to say, “Going out with TA again?  Don’t you know this weekend is Marian Days in Missouri?  Over 60,000 Vietnamese Catholics!!!  I’m sure you can find one single Vietnamese Catholic female there!”  To be frank, my mom does have a point.  TA is the closest thing I have to a best friend.  She’s hilarious, entertaining, and tons of fun.   When you have a bestie like TA, sometimes you forget that you’re still single and supposedly miserable.

3.  My mom is a cock blocker.

  • My dad is referencing to what happened with my very first girlfriend.  She was my first girlfriend, so I fell very hard for her.  I fell so hard that my grades started slipping and I had to drop a course in college.  I was a zombie in love.  Even on days where I’m sick and bed-ridden, I would crawl out of my bed just to visit my girlfriend.  Obviously my mom thought this obsession was unhealthy, so she advised that I take a break from dating and focus more on school.  I broke up with her a couple weeks later and ever since my dad has attributed my  relationship woes to my mom.

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“Online Dating 101: Being Safe”

A couple of months back, I was trying the whole online dating thing when I found out about “How About We” app.

The way it works is you just make a post about what’s your ideal date.

The post can go something like this: “How about we …

  • Grab some coffee at starbucks.”
  • Hangout at the pub and play some pool.”
  • Go to a Texas Rangers game.”

You put something up there.  If someone’s interested they’ll click on a button and you’ll get a notification saying someone’s down for some coffee with you.

You on the other hand can also browse people’s “ideal date” posts and respond to those dates if you’re interested.

Posting and browsing is free, but if you want to communicate with anyone to setup a date, you’re going to have to sign up for their membership.

Being the cheap and frugal person that I am, I decide against paying for anything that doesn’t guarantee results.  For all I know, this website could be a scam.

As an alternative, I tried to beat the system.  Or rather I found a loophole.   I posted the typical date idea with one small addition.

“Let’s grab dinner and entertainment at Dave and Busters.  Email me at myemail@hotmail.com, if you’re interested.”

Since the app charges you to communicate, I decided to bypass that step by including my own form of communication in the post.

Obviously, I realized that I was probably violating some kind of “how about we” rules/policies.  If everyone decided to do what I did, “how about we” would never make any money from all their hard work.

Within a half day, I got a nice email from their technical support saying that they deleted that post because I’m not supposed to post any personal form of communications and asked me nicely to refrain from posting anything like that in the future.

They busted my chops, but my futile attempt to beat the system actually produce some results.  To be exact, it produced one result.

I got an email from one person who was interested in going on a date with me.

After going back and forth introducing ourselves to each other, she sent me the following email:

Hi,

Well I would prefer we meet up immediately (meaning in the next few days). I realized what better way to know if I want to get to know that person more? I do ask that you post a pic with todays date so I know it’s a recent pic (I would do the same for you), it just eliminates the chances of us meeting up with a completely different person.

Two things stood out to me in this email.  First of all, she wants to meet immediately, which makes sense to me.  No use in going back and forth emailing, if you don’t enjoy each other’s company.
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