Tag Archives: inferior

“Male Superiority/Inferiority within Relationships”

  1. My friend asked me, “What intimidates you from the opposite sex?”

    • I responded with, “What do you mean what intimidates me?”

    • He elaborated, “What I mean is what is one thing that scares you, turns you off, has you packing your bags and running away from the opposite sex?”

    • I replied, “Nothing really.  I don’t get intimidated that easily.  Why should I be scared of a girl?”

  2. Friend, “Oh please.  Everyone is intimidated by something.  Especially when it comes from the opposite sex.”

    • Me,  “Okay.  Give me an example to work with.  What intimidates you?”

    • Friend, “Well for me, I take pride over the fact that I’m smart.  I enjoy exuding my intelligence especially when it comes to ladies.  The same way that a male peacock shows off it’s tail to attract a mate, I enjoy showing off my brain muscle to attract a female mate.”

  3. Me, “So you would be offended if a girl out-smarted you?”

    • Friend, “I wouldn’t be offended.  I just wouldn’t date her.”

    • Me, “That sounds like a silly reason to turn down a girl.”

    • Friend, “It sounds silly because you don’t take pride in being clever around the ladies.  I do.  It’s important that I can charm the opposite sex with my mind.”

  4. Me, “Is there anyone in your life that fits this category?”

    • Friend, “Do you remember my ex Becky?  Smart as hell.  I was actually attracted to her because she was a smart gal.  I saw it as a challenge to prove myself superior to her.”

    • Me, “Of course.  She was an honor student in college.  She’s a doctor now.  Oh yeah, what happened to you guys?”

    • Friend, “This is between us two ok?  But the reason it didn’t work out between us is because I started feeling inferior to her.  She did great in school and I couldn’t keep up with her.  I actually had to turn to her for help with my projects.  That’s when we started to drift apart.”

  5. Me, “Dude, you have serious relationship problems.”

    • Friend, “Hey, we are all wired a little different.  I can’t help it if this is how my mind works.”

    • Me, “So based on what you just said, I assume that your current girlfriend Jacky isn’t book smart?”

    • Friend, “She’s an art major.  She hates every single class except for art.  She’s having trouble with those classes, but thanks to my help she’s gonna pass them all.  In her eyes, I’m practically her hero.”

  6. Me, “Maybe that’s why it couldn’t work out with Becky, she didn’t look up to you.”

    • Friend, “That’s another way of saying it.  I need someone to see me as their knight in shining armor.”

    • Me, “Well, now that you’ve put it that way, most guys are like that.”

    • Friend, “But not everyone needs to be the smart one in the relationship.”

    • Me, “Right.  Some guys spend all their time in the gym, so they love it when girls admire their body.  Other guys love telling stories, so they appreciate a girl who enjoys his story.  And then we have guys who take pride in fixing and building, who glow when their wives praise them a job well done.”

  7. Friend, “So now that we’ve come full circle.  You want to answer my original question?”

    • Me,  “Haha, well I had no idea what you were talking about initially.  Now I do.”

    • Friend, “I can’t help it that you’re so slow.”

    • Me, “Seeing that I’m so slow, for sure I don’t care if a girl is smarter than me.  I wouldn’t mind if she is makes more money than me, has a better body, or is more sociable than I am.”

    • Friend, “I should send all heart-broken female friends to you.  You’ll never turn anyone away.”

  8. Me, “There is this one thing though.  I don’t think I could be in a relationship with a girl who is a better photographer than me.”

    • Friend, “Of course, I should’ve guessed that.  You are so passionate about photography.”

    • Me, “I wouldn’t know what’d I do if my next girlfriend took better pictures than me.  I mean, could you imagine someone who criticizes every shot you took because she knows she can take a shot that’s better than yours?  That would drive me crazy.”

    • Friend, “Join the club my friend.”
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Something Inside of You

There is something inside of you, that is inside all of us.

It only feels alive when you can do more than someone else.

“All day baby. All day. You know you can’t guard me.”

“That win was so easy. I didn’t even have to try.”



There is something inside of you, that is inside all of us.

It enjoys making others inferior, so you can feel superior.

“Are you dumb? How come you don’t know that?”

“This is so easy even a 5th grader can do it. And you’re having trouble with it?”



There is something inside of you, that is inside all of us.

It likes to equate who you are with what you have.

“Don’t worry, you’ll be happier when you get a new car. I promise.”

“I just lost all my money in the stock market. My life is over.”



There is something inside of you, that is inside all of us.

It takes everything that happens personally and then over-reacts.

“She purposely didn’t say Hi to me. What’s her problem …”

“John hasn’t text me back since I texted him 15 mins ago. Is he upset with me?”



There is something inside of you, that is inside all of us.

It likes to drop names, hoping that the association with important people will make you feel more important.

“I only do make-up for A-List celebrities such as Katy Perry and Ellen Degeneres.”

“Of course, I know John. We go way back. I’m one of the reason he is so big now. I showed him everything he knows.”



There is something inside of you, that is inside all of us.

It enjoys wanting so much, it never stops to enjoy what it has attained.

“I’m so blessed to have so much in my life, but you know what would make it even better … a job that allows me to travel.”

“My closet is full of Air Jordans. I have enough to wear one pair everyday of the year. OMG, they’re coming out with a new one next month! Must camp overnight to be the first one to get it.”



There is something inside of you, that is inside all of us.

It relentlessly find ways to keep you away from happiness.

It keeps you busy with trivial matters, so you might overlook all the important stuff.

That something which is inside of you and everyone else, it is called the ego.

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Not Even Here

I’ve been hanging with my friends often.

And more than once, someone has said following to me:

“You know, I don’t even notice you are here man.

It’s like you’re not even here.

You okay man?”



And I usually answer with:

“Yeh, I’m perfectly fine, nothing wrong here.”

With a big smile.

They usually go back to talking and socializing with everyone.

And I go back to my own reserved, quiet self.



I’m reading this book called “A New Earth” by Eckhart Tolle.

It says that everyone is trying so hard to stand out and differentiate themselves from everybody else.

We are obsessed with wearing the newest brands.

We try to get into exclusive events.

We strive to be the center of everyone’s attention.



There’s nothing wrong with feeling special and different, because everyone is special and different.

But when it becomes compulsive and you start to feel inferior when others don’t notice you.

Then perhaps there is a problem lurking beneath the surface.

The author prescribes the following to remedy the incessant need to always standout.

Do the opposite of standing out.



Blend in, don’t try so hard to stand out, be there without drawing attention to you.

The trick is to do it willingly.

There will be a part of you that rebels and say’s this is wrong.

It will make you feel extremely uncomfortable.

It won’t allow you to just blend it.



Of course you will meet resistance.

You’ve spent your whole life being brain-washed by everyone that standing out is better than blending in.

All that thinking become habitualized.

Your job is to program your brain to think otherwise.

And that just means continuous repetition of the newest message, until that too becomes a habit.



The power in willingly wanting to blend in communicates the following message:

That it is perfectly fine not to stand out all the time.

That you are loved just the way you are whether everyone is giving you attention or not.

That you being who you are right now is perfect, without the need of trying to be more.

Everything is already good and even if I don’t do anything at this moment, everything will continue to be good.



This is what I’ve been practicing in the company of friends.

Just being quiet until I’m spoken to.

Not needing to dominate the conversation with others to show how knowledgeable I am.

Allowing others to have their moment in the spotlight without feeling inferior or envious of them.

Being okay with losing an argument, even if it make me look bad in front of people I think highly of.



In the end, what this looks live from the outside is me not even there.

But inside, I am there.

I know exactly what’s happening on the outside and the inside.

I can freely choose to communicate without needing to stand out.

If the situation doesn’t require anything of me, I’m perfectly fine with just blending in.



It’s okay to stand out.

But it is equally okay to not stand out.

It shouldn’t be a sin to blend in.

But it can be a sin, if we make it into our own personal sin.

We are always love-able whether we decide to stand out or blend in.

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