Tag Archives: karma

FB Status Update: Booty Bumping

I was reading an e-book in my car when all of a sudden my whole car started to shake.

My first reaction was, “Oh sh*t, earthquake!!!”

Then I realized I’m in Texas and Texans don’t do earthquakes, we do tornadoes and hail.

I looked in the rearview mirror and saw this mini-van all up against my rear bumper.

“Oh great, someone just booty bumped me. Well their loss is my gain. Either we settle with cash or I’m going to get myself a brand new rear bumper.”

I wait until they park. No way am I endangering my life by walking out there while they’re still behind the wheel.

If they can’t avoid my Toyota Matrix, what makes you think they’ll avoid me?

I wait … they drive up a lil’ and I noticed it’s an Asian lady.

I wait even more … she backs up again.

“Are you serious? Do you want bump me again? Is this a game to you, you sick Asian lady?”

This time she manages not to hit me, and I realize the only reason she reversed again was to survey the damage.

She has the nerve to check out my damaged goods. Apparently she doesn’t see any real damage done and about to speed away.

I realized, “Oh crap!!! She’s going to make a getaway. If I’m ever going to make her responsible, I’d better get out now.”

Despite knowing exactly what to do, I didn’t do it. I stayed in my car and watched her go.

Here is the reason why:

A long time ago, when I was really young, unapologetically stupid, and extremely good looking. When all I ever did was drugs and sleep around with amazingly good-looking super-models.

I think it was about two weekends ago …

I too was a hit-and-runner. I was making a turn and scratched the side of my Toyota Matrix against the rear bumper of a huge truck. Of course the truck was un-damaged.

I could’ve left a note, but I didn’t. I was too scared. I just surveyed the damage like the Asian Lady and made a run for it. Lucky for me no one was around.

Perhaps this is karma. Now I know how it feels to have somebody ram their thing up my rear.

It’s not a pleasant feeling, I tell you!

Well at least I’ve finally found my closure. I can finally move on with my life now.

#NotEveryoneEnjoysItUpTheRear
#KarmaReallyDoesExistExclamationPoint
#LateNightConfessionsWithThao
#OfficiallyTraumatizedFromDriving
#CarsShouldHaveDiapersToProtectTheirRearsFromAccidents

Advertisements
Tagged , , , , , , ,

Movie Reflections: Looper

(***Contains spoilers to the movie.)



From watching the movie Looper, I gather one common theme.

Everyone is willing to kill someone else, in order for someone they love.

Bruce Willis is willing to kill 3 different kids in order to protect his love.

The Rainmaker is willing to kill all loopers in order to avenge his mother’s death.

Joseph Gordon-Lovett is willing to kill Bruce Willis in order to protect himself.

Everyone is out to get someone.

This common trend changes in the end.



Joseph Gordon-Lovett plays present day Joe.

Bruce Willis plays 30 years in the future Joe.

If Bruce Willis dies, it means Joseph Gordon-Lovett will also die in 30 years.

But if Joseph Gordon-Lovett dies, it means Bruce Willis will immediately cease to exist.

With no present day Joe alive, there is no one to age 30 years into the future.

Willis cannot kill Gordon-Lovett, but Gordon-Lovett can kill Willis.

And he does kill Willis, but without really doing anything to Willis.



In the future, there exists a horrible being called the Rainmaker.

The Rainmaker is responsible for destroying the world and ruling over it with violence.

Bruce Willis goes back in time to kill the Rainmaker while he is still small and vulnerable.

Bruce Willis wishes to prevent the Rainmaker from killing his wife who dies in the future.

Joseph Gordon-Lovett quickly befriends the child Rainmaker.

Soon, we find out why the child is called Rainmaker.

He can make other human beings explode leaving a rain a blood that showers the earth.



Towards the end of the movie, Bruce Willis catches up to the child Rainmaker.

Bruce Willis is ready to kill the kid, but the Rainmaker’s mother is standing in the way.

She yells for the kid to run away while she blocks the path of the gun shot.

Joseph Gordon-Lovett runs to scene only to helplessly witness this from afar.

Suddenly, he see’s the cycle of deaths.

He see’s Bruce Willis killing the Rainmaker’s mother.

He see’s the Rainmaker escaping, hurt and bitter.



He see’s the Rainmaker growing up and taking out his anger on the whole world.

He see’s the Rainmaker once again killing Bruce Willis’s wife.

He see’s Bruce Willis once again going back in time to kill the child Rainmaker again.

Joseph Gordon-Lovett see’s how futile Bruce Willis’ actions are.

Bruce Willis’ action to kill the Rainmaker causes the Rainmaker grows without a mother.

He will grow into a vengeful, hateful being with a uncontrollable power.

Bruce Willis’ need to kill someone, ensures that someone will eventually kill his wife.



If you spread hate, hate will one day come back for you.

If you kill someone to protect your own, someday someone will kill someone you cherish to protect their own.

How can you blame them for doing the exact same thing you did?

Joseph Gordon-Lovett realized this just before Bruce Willis was going to shoot the mother.

He realized the only way to prevent a chaotic future, was to stop the cycle of hate and violence.

He took the gun in his hand, spun it around so that it pointed at his own heart.

And he squeezed the trigger, ending his own life.



He knew he couldn’t stop Bruce Willis in time, but he knew if he died his future self would also die.

By killing himself, he made sure that Bruce Willis could not exist anymore.

Everyone is always busy trying to kill someone else to protect the one they love.

Rarely does anyone see that the problem perhaps could exist within oneself.

And even rarer is to find someone willing to sacrifice himself for the good of others.

Joseph Gordon-Lovett made this decision at the end of the movie.

He ensured the Rainmaker’s mother would live to raise the child with plenty of love.



Most of us seek to solve problems by putting the blame on others.

You despise them, you spread rumors, and perhaps even get into verbal and physical conflict with them.

You end up creating bad karma, that one day will come back for you with a vengeance.

I believe that all the solutions to our problems can be found by looking inside instead of outside.

By looking inside, we then focus on the one thing we do have control over.

Perhaps then we would be able to sacrifice a part of ourselves for the benefit of others.

In every moment, you can choose to be like Bruce Willis or Joseph Gordon-Lovett.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Advertisements