“Male Superiority/Inferiority within Relationships”

1. My friend asked me, “What intimidates you from the opposite sex?”

   • I responded with, “What do you mean what intimidates me?”

   • He elaborated, “What I mean is what is one thing that scares you, turns you off, has you packing your bags and running away from the opposite sex?”

   • I replied, “Nothing really.  I don’t get intimidated that easily.  Why should I be scared of a girl?”

2. Friend, “Oh please.  Everyone is intimidated by something.  Especially when it comes from the opposite sex.”

   • Me,  “Okay.  Give me an example to work with.  What intimidates you?”

   • Friend, “Well for me, I take pride over the fact that I’m smart.  I enjoy exuding my intelligence especially when it comes to ladies.  The same way that a male peacock shows off it’s tail to attract a mate, I enjoy showing off my brain muscle to attract a female mate.”

3. Me, “So you would be offended if a girl out-smarted you?”

   • Friend, “I wouldn’t be offended.  I just wouldn’t date her.”

   • Me, “That sounds like a silly reason to turn down a girl.”

   • Friend, “It sounds silly because you don’t take pride in being clever around the ladies.  I do.  It’s important that I can charm the opposite sex with my mind.”

4. Me, “Is there anyone in your life that fits this category?”

   • Friend, “Do you remember my ex Becky?  Smart as hell.  I was actually attracted to her because she was a smart gal.  I saw it as a challenge to prove myself superior to her.”

   • Me, “Of course.  She was an honor student in college.  She’s a doctor now.  Oh yeah, what happened to you guys?”

   • Friend, “This is between us two ok?  But the reason it didn’t work out between us is because I started feeling inferior to her.  She did great in school and I couldn’t keep up with her.  I actually had to turn to her for help with my projects.  That’s when we started to drift apart.”

5. Me, “Dude, you have serious relationship problems.”

   • Friend, “Hey, we are all wired a little different.  I can’t help it if this is how my mind works.”

   • Me, “So based on what you just said, I assume that your current girlfriend Jacky isn’t book smart?”

   • Friend, “She’s an art major.  She hates every single class except for art.  She’s having trouble with those classes, but thanks to my help she’s gonna pass them all.  In her eyes, I’m practically her hero.”

6. Me, “Maybe that’s why it couldn’t work out with Becky, she didn’t look up to you.”

   • Friend, “That’s another way of saying it.  I need someone to see me as their knight in shining armor.”

   • Me, “Well, now that you’ve put it that way, most guys are like that.”

   • Friend, “But not everyone needs to be the smart one in the relationship.”

   • Me, “Right.  Some guys spend all their time in the gym, so they love it when girls admire their body.  Other guys love telling stories, so they appreciate a girl who enjoys his story.  And then we have guys who take pride in fixing and building, who glow when their wives praise them a job well done.”

7. Friend, “So now that we’ve come full circle.  You want to answer my original question?”

   • Me,  “Haha, well I had no idea what you were talking about initially.  Now I do.”

   • Friend, “I can’t help it that you’re so slow.”

   • Me, “Seeing that I’m so slow, for sure I don’t care if a girl is smarter than me.  I wouldn’t mind if she is makes more money than me, has a better body, or is more sociable than I am.”

   • Friend, “I should send all heart-broken female friends to you.  You’ll never turn anyone away.”

8. Me, “There is this one thing though.  I don’t think I could be in a relationship with a girl who is a better photographer than me.”

   • Friend, “Of course, I should’ve guessed that.  You are so passionate about photography.”

   • Me, “I wouldn’t know what’d I do if my next girlfriend took better pictures than me.  I mean, could you imagine someone who criticizes every shot you took because she knows she can take a shot that’s better than yours?  That would drive me crazy.”

   • Friend, “Join the club my friend.”